He Made This Way Too Easy

Wow, John. I didn't think even you could be that stupid. Sure, you've been an opportunistic elitist all your life- but usually you're a little more controlled than this. Was it really necessary to publicly dump all over the "little people" that you so poorly pretend to represent?

Let me ask you, John- Did I not study hard enough at West Point? Is that how I wound up being stuck in Iraq?

How about those people that you send to the Service Academies every year? What do you tell them when you call them with the good news? "Congratulations, Mike- I've decided to make you my primary nominee for the Air Force Academy this year! Now make sure you study hard, because I'd hate to see you end up in Iraq..."

You say that you're sorry, but be honest- what are you sorry for?

Are you sorry that you accidentally exposed your elitist, holier-than-thou persona to the entire world with one unfortunate moment of honesty?

Are you sorry that your pathetic attempt at a cover story ("I meant to say that George Bush is a jerk, but I just screwed up the punch-line") has solidified your status as a world class liar?

Are you sorry that your political career is over? Are you going to miss it? How about the Swiftees? Will you miss them? Yeah- I thought you would.

Well, it's time to go, Johnny. It's time to abandon that dream of becoming JFK the 2nd. Your "war-hero" status that you tried so hard to cultivate- gone. Too many people know about your fake write-ups that led to your unearned medals.

Your dreams of being a "man of the people" who will lead our great nation to peace and prosperity- not going to happen. It was never going to happen. You're spineless. You command zero respect. Nobody likes you. Just walk away, man. Just walk away.